Navigating Life’s Shortcuts
We are hardwired to form habits. It’s our brain’s tricky little shortcut to preserve energy.
Patterns of behavior solidify after doing the same thing over and over again until you begin to do them without thinking. If you’ve ever gotten into your car and then somehow found yourself at home without remembering the drive, congratulations, your brain applied a habit/ pattern-based shortcut.
You were likely fully mentally in another place, using your conscious thinking power on whatever problem or conversation you were then consumed by.
This tendency can work for you if you’ve created positive habits that your body and brain begin doing automatically, or it can be unhelpful if, for example you turn to cigarettes, a pint of ice cream, or an excess of boozy beverages when you’ve had a particularly stressful day.
When I notice my habits stacking in a direction, leading me to a place I don’t want to be, I must apply pressure to change them. This is where full mental inertia reveals itself.
Changing is hard work that takes time, clear intention, and ease.
Start with reflection.
For me, the realization of a need to change begins quietly. I begin to feel uneasy or unsettled about something I can’t quite put my finger on. The awareness becomes like an itch you can’t scratch or a mosquito buzzing around in your room at night.
You can kind-of hear it. You know it’s coming for you.
For clarity, I journal.
Grab a notebook or start a note on your phone. You can try creating a folder on Google Drive or wherever makes you feel comfortable. From there on, it’s pretty simple.
Ask yourself:
What am I doing that I really enjoy?
What am I doing that makes me feel good?
Who + what in my world gives me energy?
What do I currently do that makes me feel bad (about myself)?
What would I like more of?
What do I love doing that I haven’t done in a while?
Taking time to question your world is both essential and necessary to build one you love. Even if you don’t immediately begin installing new habits, this act will help increase daily presence enough so that now, these questions are top of mind.
You’ll begin walking through your day and noticing how every interaction makes you feel. You don’t have to say anything to anyone. Just log your feelings in your mind. Maybe write your discoveries down in your notebook.
Over time, you’ll become curious about adding new experiences into your life, wondering how they’ll make you feel.
For example, since my latest self-check-in, I’ve begun meeting new people and socializing more, also focusing on longevity-oriented activities.
I’m learning that overcoming inertia isn’t about working hard to achieve something. It’s about learning how to permit yourself to enjoy life. It’s about allowing things that genuinely make you feel good to enrich your life, filling your cup so you can show up as your best self.
My current theory:
Self-love is a journey of discovering what feels good now that is also good for you in the long term. It’s about caring enough about your future to give yourself grace for stumbles on the road to fulfilling your heart’s deepest desires. It’s about giving yourself permission to show up as everything you are becoming. Giving yourself permission to be happy and leave some of the weight you’ve been carrying throughout your life at your feet so you can move forward with lightness and enthusiasm.
It’s about setting yourself up for success and doing yourself a favor as often as possible.
I give myself permission to find moments of pause and quiet the world down enough to hear my voice.
If you learn to love yourself more, you’ll take better care of yourself and want to make better choices that positively influence your future life.
Great resources for support through this phase:
Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert
Who are you Really?: The Surprising Puzzle of Personality by Brian R. Little
The Power of Vulnerability by Brene Brown
Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl
Can’t Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds by David Goggins
You are a Dream by Guillaume Wolf
RESET podcast with Liz Tran
The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying-Up by Marie Kondo
Outlive: The Science & Art of Longevity by Peter Attia
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel A. van der Kolk
The Creative Act by Rick Rubin
Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin
Pro-Tip: Listening to books while walking, jogging, or biking has been the best and easiest way for me to consume information.
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